Quotes of the Morning

“Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.”
-Demetri Martin

“President Bush is trying to put a positive spin on the latest bad economic numbers. Today he declared victory in the 'War on Jobs.'”
-Craig Kilborn

“Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished.”
-Leslie Nielsen

“The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you're on the job.”
-Slappy White

“It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”
-Muhammad Ali

“I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'.”
-Robert Paul

“A good rule of thumb is if you've made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you've made a serious vocational error.”
-Dennis Miller

“I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”
-Jerome K Jerome (Three Men in a Boat, 1889)