Quotes of the Morning: D'oW

“Another lazy day.. Hmm… What can I slap together in 5 minutes to send out? How about some great quotes from our government?”
-Skippy

“Marge: This is the worst thing you've ever done.
Homer: You say that so often that it lost its meaning.”
-The Simpsons

“Oops.. Sorry. That was the Simpsons. Odd that I didn’t catch that immediately…”
-Skippy

“Homer: Oh Lisa, there's no record of a hurricane ever hitting Springfield.
Lisa: Yes, but the records only go back to 1978 when the hall of records was mysteriously blown away.”
-The Simpsons

“Hey.. This actually kind of works. If anything it makes the Administration sound smarter than most of the things that they actually say..”
-Skippy

“Kent Brockman: We win again. But the real winners here are Marge's Hors D'Oeuvres. Homer: How do you come up with such witty remarks?
[focuses in on ear plug/mic]
Guy in the van: I guess you could say its my racket.
Kent Brockman: I guess you could say I'm Iraqi.
Homer: Get off my property.”
-The Simpsons

“Now a few for Fearless Leader. With Karl Rove leaving maybe he can hire a few of the Simpsons writers. They seem to have a firm grip on his speaking style..”
-Skippy

“Oh, so they have internet on computers now!”
-Homer Simpson

“Homer: Aw, twenty dollars! I wanted a peanut!
Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts!
Homer: Explain how!
Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services!
Homer: Woo-hoo!”
-The Simpsons

“How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?”
-Homer Simpson

“And now a few for Alberto ‘Badges? We don’t need no stinking badges!’ Gonzales”
-Skippy

“Scully: Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
Homer: Yes. (lie dectector blows up)”
-The Simpsons

“I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.”
-Homer Simpson

“Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it.”
-Homer Simpson

“Wow. This Administration has come a long way. No matter how hard you try to make fun of them they always seem to be able to be a little worse in real life.”
-Skippy

“Seventy-one times Gonzales claimed a faulty memory when members of the Senate committee asked such questions as who decided on the ousted eight, and whether Gonzales was or was not involved in the evaluation process.”
-Associated Press, April 20, 2007