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Four Color Politics

Mainly the Quotes of the Morning, with occasional Other Crap.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Quotes of the Morning: Wasn't Me

"The evidence indicates that Iraq is reconstituting its nuclear weapons program
[…]
Iraq has attempted to purchase high-strength aluminum tubes and other equipment needed for gas centrifuges, which are used to enrich uranium for nuclear weapons."
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, October 7, 2002

“The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa.”
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, January 28, 2003

"We believe [Saddam] has, in fact, reconstituted nuclear weapons."
-Dick Cheney, March 16, 2003

"[The CIA has] solid reporting of senior-level contacts between Iraq and al-Qaeda going back a decade."
-George Tenet, October 7, 2002

“We've learned that Iraq has trained al-Qaeda members in bomb-making and poisons and deadly gases ... Alliance with terrorists could allow the Iraqi regime to attack America without leaving any fingerprints."
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, October 7, 2002

“We have also discovered through intelligence that Iraq has a growing fleet of manned and unmanned aerial vehicles that could be used to disperse chemical or biological weapons across broad areas. We are concerned that Iraq is exploring ways of using these UAVs for missions targeting the United States.”
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, October 7, 2002

"We have seen intelligence over many months that they have chemical and biological weapons, and that they have dispersed them and that they're weaponized and that, in one case at least, the command and control arrangements have been established."
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, February 8, 2003

"Our conservative estimate is that Iraq today has a stockpile of between 100 and 500 tons of chemical weapons agent. That is enough to fill 16,000 battlefield rockets."
-Colin Powell, February 5, 2003

"We know where [the WMD] are. They're in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south, and north somewhat."
-Donald Rumsfeld, March 30, 2003

“I don’t have the time or space to go over all of these, so let’s just look at one of them.. Hmmm… How about this one?”
-Skippy


"Yes, we found a biological laboratory in Iraq which the UN prohibited."
-George ‘Dubya’ Bush, June 1, 2003.

“Yep.. No doubt. No question. Only one little problem.. The Washington Post discovered that the ‘biological laboratories’ weren’t, and that the White House had been aware of that when Dubya made his earlier statement. Only one thing to do.”
-Skippy


“You know, I saw some reporting talking about how this latest revelation — which is not something that is new; this is all old information that’s being rehashed — was an embarrassment for the White House. No, it’s an embarrassment for the media that is out there reporting this.
I brought up with some of you earlier today some of the reporting that was based of this Washington Post report. And I talked to one of network about it…they expressed their apologies to the White House.
I hope they will go and publicly apologize on the air about the statements that were made, because I think it is important given that they had made those statements in front of all their viewers. So we look forward to that happening as well.”
-White House Spokesman Scott McClellan, April 12, 2006

“Y'all start putting up with all kinds of crazy shit. I guess it's hard to find somebody that knows how to do it to you right, because when y'all find one, y'all stick through that man through all kinds of bullsh*t.
I know a man got busted coming out of another woman's house. Show you how far a woman will stoop. He got busted coming out of another woman's house. His woman saw him come out, knew that the woman lived there and didn't say sh*t. Wait till they got home and said: ‘What the hell was you doing in that b*tch's house?’
You know what the man said?
‘Wasn't me.’
‘I looked right in your face.’
‘Wasn't me.’
‘Well, I'm supposed to be a fool, right?’
‘Hey. Wasn't me.’
You know what the woman said?
‘Maybe it wasn't you.’
I got a friend got busted in his house, in his bed, where him and his wife sleep, with another woman, f**king! His wife walked inside the house, opened up the bedroom door, saw her man in her bed with another woman, f**king. She walks in: The man jumped up, saw his woman standing there. She ran down the hallway. Chased his
woman down the hallway butt naked with a rock-hard d*ck, talking about, ‘I'm sorry.’
This sound like a tragedy, right?
No, it was like this: ‘Baby, wait, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Baby, look. Whoa, hold on. Wait, we got to talk. Baby, I am sorry.’
‘No, you're not sorry. I can't believe you did this. You have no respect for me. Get the f**k... Don't you f**king touch me.’
‘Wait, baby, I am sorry. Wait a second.’
‘No, if you're sorry, you wouldn't have f**ked her!’
And then you change the sh*t around. Right, guys?
‘OK, wait a minute! Wait one second, goddamn it! Yes, I f**ked her, yes. Is that what you want me to say? I f**ked her? I f**ked her. We f**ked, all right? You happy now? We f**ked! Now, let's talk about the word 'f**k' for a minute. Because that's a very important word here. F**k, yes, we did. F**k. I f**ked her. I make love to you, and if you gonna let a f**k come between our love, there's something really wrong happening here, baby.’"
-Eddie Murphy, Raw

“And thus we can encapsulate the Bush Administration’s relationship with the Press...”
-Skippy

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