Quotes of the Morning: Thanksgiving

“Thanksgiving is a typically American holiday...The lavish meal is a symbol of the fact that abundant consumption is the result and reward of production.”
-Ayn Rand (1905 - 1982)

“Oh bitter, bitter Ayn Rand.. Will you never find happiness? In two days it is Thanksgiving, the American holiday of family, excessive eating and football. Enjoy yourselves, drive safely, and give a little sincere thanks to the Universe or your Deity of Choice that you’ve made it this far. Life is pretty good sometimes.”
-Skippy

“Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.”
-Mark Twain

“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.”
-Henny Youngman (1906 - 1998)

“Thanksgiving Day is a day devoted by persons with inflammatory rheumatism to thanking a loving Father that it is not hydrophobia.”
-H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)

“On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment - halftime.”
-Unknown

“A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry - that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three-Mile Island.”
-Johnny Carson (1925 - )

“I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving for my friends, the old and the new. “
-Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882)

“Never eat more than you can lift.”
-Miss Piggy

“Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.”
-Samuel Butler (1835 - 1902)

“Preach not to others what they should eat, but eat as becomes you, and be silent.”
-Epictetus (50-138)

“A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.”
-Aesop